And We Are Very Good Friends

Life is so confusing. How can one simultaneously think (a) I am so beyond the point of having another baby and (b) what’s the point of life if I don’t have another baby? O_O Srsly. Who thinks these things – both. together.

I blame 30. 30 is almost definitely maybe beating me at this point. She brought her A game and I am routinely caught unawares. For instance: this is the age where I am perpetually confused as to whether everyone’s older than me or everyone’s younger than me. Like I’m in the middle of this transition. That’s it. That’s the end of the sentence. I’m in the middle of the transition. Like, it started last year and I dunno, next year it’ll finish? I have no idea. I just know things make less sense right now. I am serious, this is coming from a sappily married woman who is trying to explain the strangeness of 30: people can be too young for me to innocently say out loud that they’re handsome without feeling like a criminal.  That concept, I assume, becomes normal between now and 40. This year? It’s WEIRD.

Then there’s that whole having to ask friends whether they know what I’m talking about. Things that are rapidly becoming off limits with about half of my friends. Oh, I dunno. Toad the Wet Sprocket. Yeah. They are now background music of a party thrown by grown ups with tweens for kids. Meaning when I start singing along and pass the fake mic, my gal pal has no idea why I expect her to know the lyrics. O_o Music references are now in the strange middle ground where they’ll know stuff before my time and present day but not what I listened to in middle school. Sigh. Silverchair. O_O Silverchair, people. Arrested Development? Anyone?!

Now I realize there’s the recent throwback music that is represented on television and then the recent throwback music they throw in for authenticity – like Toad the Wet Sprocket. Because, seriously, the Rembrandts were so not a thing and who EVER heard the theme song for Friends on the radio?! Who?

Why did no one tell me 30 was awkward?! Because they either told me it was “old” (half my friends) or barely adult (the other half). Thanks for nothin.

That’s not my girlfriend behind me. That’s 30. Freaking me out.

Geez. Someone who’s 40 tell me I’ll be okay.

Oh, life.

(is bigger….it’s bigger than you and you are not me SEE THAT’S WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT! Why doesn’t everyone know what I’m singing when I do that?)

12 thoughts on “And We Are Very Good Friends

  1. I am 44. And you are Just Getting Started. And I wish I could tell you life gets less confusing and weird, but it doesn’t – well, maybe for boring people it does. But you aren’t that. You’re you. And you’re going to be AWESOME!


  2. It’s the one hit wonders that they have never heard of that always shocks me. I was born in the 80’s and I know the music from the decade. They are born in the 90’s and know nothing of the 90’s very strange.

    Candle Box, “left me far behind”. The radio couldn’t stop playing that song in the 90’s and they know it not.


  3. Also, someone who isn’t quite 40 yet tossed out an Eddie Murphy “Raw” line today and it sailed right by me.

    I made up for it by riffing on quotes from Raising Arizona. At least I hope I made up for it.


    • Yeeeah. I didn’t realize I’d JUST turned 30 until I wrote this post. I’m all over the place. Basically, someone asks how old I am and I start by recalling how old my husband is and then subtracting one. Because I’m college educated.


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