Whenever I Want You

Last night’s dream was strange, if only because I have not partaken in the literature trend and yet there it was. Zombies. A dream about zombies. It sort of “starts” with me watching an-almost documentary – in that I seem to be “there”, but at the same time there’s a Sigourney Weaver-sounding voiceover m’explique-ing – about what actually looks like a friendly Frankenstein. He has like Marge hair, btw, except it’s a shade of green. He’s messing around with a guy who’s…also a Frankenstein – except this is my dream edition of zombies – who at one point is being tossed back and forth in a him-sized suitcase. He has to remain locked in place (as in lock his joints and try to be inanimate). Oh, he looked like one of the dudes from Yo Gabba Gabba!

Exact same stance, clearly not orange, same shape and height but his hair was green and Marge-esque.

Anyway, the hope was that the whole suitcase and him with it would get tossed over a fence. Being inside the enclosed area while he “turns” will ensure that he’ll not do anything to damage himself while he’s zombified. Because in my dream, the fear is apparently not that you’ll eat anyone’s brains but that you’ll accidentally kill yourself – since you pretty much become a green-hued-retard. The huge, attacking Frankenstein is like the archetype guy who’s always a zombie and is also a giant – the rest of us apparently turn for a period of time and then eventually wake up?

Anyway, so when the guy in the suitcase who is hoping to get tossed over the fence lands – it’s me. Right. And I’m trying to keep my green Marge hair down so the Frankenzombie won’t see that I’m out of the suitcase and also still outside the fence. At this point, I take my chances that I can keep myself from “changing” and decide to get out of there. We’re right up against a highway, so I dash over and start trying to hitch a ride. Frankenzombie sees me and decides to try and knock me out. By throwing entire trees at me. The first one is doing somersaults in the air in an arc, heading straight for me. I step back and out of the way and it comes to a surprisingly graceful stop, as opposed to quaking the earth and then continuing to slide. Anyway, as he throws the second tree, I rush forward into the car that’s stopped for me. And away we go.

So, it’s sort of like a pick up with one of those “custom” trailers on the back? Like my neighbor used to have? You know the one? Anyway, in hitch-hiker movie fashion, it’s packed with whatever back there so I’m sitting in the front seat with this somewhat older, white woman. And then suddenly, my son, Ezra is in a car seat between the two of us. At one point, we’re driving up a steep, steep highway – which is a fixture in many of my dreams – and I guess it sort of resembles if you were driving in the groove of a hollowed tree? It was…weird. For some reason, it gives me a sense of a roller coaster (which it always does and not the safe ones, btw) and at the same time it feels… like… Hobbiton? What?! Anyway, I feel like none of this is clear to you. Moving forward. She and I are chatting and I mention that I actually was just with a zombie, so she rightly assumes – though the guy didn’t seem to bite or otherwise mark me – that I’m primed to change. She pulls out the cigarette lighter and moves it toward me. I freak out, internally. Because, yeah. Being burned does not seem fun.

“This still look like a curfew to you?” By which, in dream logic, I think she really meant, does this startle you?

“Yep. Still looks like it’d burn the ____ out of me.” We both chuckle and she puts it back, but says she’ll make sure to keep an eye on me. At this point, we reach her house. By which point, she and I are related and also there’s her husband and oh yeah, my husband. We didn’t all get out of the car, but we’re all part of the dream when we get in the house which has a wide, circular sort of living room “pod” and then rooms that go off of that and out the many sliding glass doors to my right is a swimming pool. And I see that I have my swim suit, …in a drawer in the back room…but I decide that tomorrow is a big day so I’ll just keep packing. Because, at this point, Josh is outside walking by the pool, her husband is on the phone talking about how some real estate deal isn’t going into escrow, Ezra has been taken out of his carseat and – at first, I think her husband took him somewhere and hid him from me. I had somehow just come from the back of the house – getting stuff to pack. Because like I said, now we’re family and my stuff was at her house. But when I come look at the couch under the window, I see he’s sleeping and wrapped in a blanket.

The sooner Sunday comes, the better, I think. Apparently, today is Saturday in my dream, too. And the next day, we’d be going to church with them and then leaving from there. The sense is that we’d be taking a trip far away – possibly the distance from California to Montreal again? And in that house with that couple, I’m super anxious. Like I was safer dodging trees with Frankenzombie. Because if I do start to change or worse, if they just get antsy and think I’m about to change, I can be seriously hurt. In my mind, I’m stressed out because I am pretty sure I can stave off the zombie-switch but then suddenly I’ll get nervous and wonder if that’s the strange, empty I’m feeling. But also, I don’t really believe in zombies? Or at least I thought I didn’t until something happened and I’m supposed to become one. Anyway, I’m packing a backpack with our family Bible and some of my other writing stuff and she’s walking out the sliding glass door next to me and catches my eye, warily. I smile at her, emotional response being another indication that I’m still me. She tells her husband outside that it’s “the weirdest thing” that I haven’t switched.

And I attribute this entire dream to seeing book covers of the zombie flavor. Thanks. That and when I awoke I saw a picture online of Taylor Lautner – that movie doesn’t have zombies but the SNL Taylor Swift parody was about Frankensteins…you see the connection – and though I’m pleased with an ethnic kid finally being the heartthrob, let’s be real. That kid looks weird.



4 thoughts on “Whenever I Want You

  1. Nice. I had a few dreams last night, but the one that stands out as most annoying was the one where an agent liked my query. O.O Yes. I’m dreaming about queries now. ARGFH.


  2. Huh. In my last dream, I was falling asleep in the lounge and my flatmate told me to go to bed. No, not reality. A dream.

    The fact that I feel the need to clarify illustrates how truly boring a dream it was.

    And you wonder why my blog has been empty of late. At least Zombies are exciting!


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