Torrie Is My Guinea!

Okay, so my cousin Torrie – with whom I have been connecting on our family site – has finally joined the blog community and in my attempt to introduce her properly, I came back to a topic that is constantly confusing me! But I think I finally have a handle on the situation so I’m posting it here before I forget all over again! Aaaaand pray I get the basics right:


Okay, so at the top we have Elmer Luke and Arethea Clemons – my grandparents, but Torrie’s great-grandparents. This is important because it’s the generation that determines the cousin titles. That sounds obvious but it … really wasn’t. I got confused over this repeatedly. And still do if I don’t have an example to work with. Sorry, Torrie! πŸ™‚ So anyway! My grandparents had my dad (in the picture up there that almost sounds like revolution), my aunt Juanita (in the picture to the right) and about a zillion other kids. Or, like, six. Anyway, then Aunt Juanita had my FIRST cousin, Lorrie, and my dad had me (…well. After about a jillion other people. Or six. And after many millions of my cousins were born.) Lorrie is Torrie’s mother. SO. When my first cousin has a child, that person (ie, Torrie) becomes my first cousin ONCE REMOVED. Aaaand, we’re like the same age, as you can tell from my picture (the bottom of the left column) and her pretty b&w (at the bottom of the right column).Β  How does that HAPPEN?

So, that whole second cousin thing. According to (and feel free to check my work!), they would have the same great-grandparents as myself, but not the same grandparents. So, my great-aunt’s daughter, Deb, is my second cousin! Right?! When you have a family as big as the Clemons clan, this sort of thing comes up pretty often.

Anyway, the first time I think I really seriously tried to get a handle on this was after watching a BBC Reveals documentary on incest. O_O Yeah, aside from that german couple that just refused to stop bumping uglies (even after one of their four children was born with some sort of mental retardation), there’s that whole law that allows you to marry in your family after the third cousin. Well, now that I look at it, third cousins are pretty far down the line. It just means you have the same great-great grandparents. Same generation. Different grandparents. Still. With six billion people on earth…I’m feeling like you could probably get out of the family tree.


5 thoughts on “Torrie Is My Guinea!

  1. LOL!!! I’m so glad you got a good pic of me, because there are some circulating the internet of me that are pretty objectionable…so I appreciate that in more ways than you know! Girl, you’ve got me crossing my eyes trying to figure out if we are 1st or 2nd cousins! I’m glad you got it figured out though.


  2. Yeah that incest thing is kind of creepy Beth…
    but yeah..3rd cousins…totally distant…second cousins..still probably cool? ^.O

    Seriously though. The cousin thing is headache inducing.

    I think I found some shorthand for it somewhere…

    Your cousin’s kids = cousins once removed
    Your parent’s cousins = cousins once removed
    Your parent’s cousins kids = your second cousins
    Grandparents cousins kids kids = 3rd cousin

    Like..the “once removed” doesn’t indication directionality – it just means that they are one generation off from you, could be up or down…so parent’s cousins are one up, your cousins kids are one down.

    /end ramble

    Oh, and the more I look at the word “cousin” typed out, the more I think that there is something seriously wrong with it.


  3. Hey, somebody’ll find it because they’re preparing to marry their 3rd cousin. πŸ˜€ And they’ll get the good news and the blessed day will go on!

    Yes, the removed doesn’t indication the direction, Andy. Sounds right. πŸ˜€

    And most words that I use frequently (or read) end up looking like gibberish. Why does that happen?!


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